It wasn’t quite two seasons long but that’s just a trifle—Mike
D’Antoni was hired by the Los Angeles Lakers ten games into the 2012-13
campaign and took them on an unapologetic spin through his uniquely myopic,
often entertaining and ultimately disastrous brand of basketball.
Along the road were too many injuries to recount, empowerment
for minimum-salary castoffs and 67 wins and 87 losses. Yowsa!
The overall total reads better than the denouement—his second
season accounted for 55 of those misfires and will go down as the
worst loss record in franchise history.
Toward the end, it had become a screaming banshee death
spiral capped off with one last flourish that says more about D’Antoni’s lack
of tether to the franchise than any other singular action.
The Lakers ended their train wreck with back-to-back wins,
thus squandering any chance to move up the ladder in the all-important draft
lottery.
And when told by reporters of the implication of beating the
Spurs in the last game of the regular season, the onetime COY responded, “They
played hard, and I think, if I’m not mistaken, it’s the same number of ping-pong
balls, right? They flip a coin, or something.”
Oh, you impish wag.
He was informed of his misperception, of course.
But in the end it really didn’t matter—D’Antoni had long
since gone all in on a basketball philosophy that could just have well been
told in iconic theme park verse:
“We’re merrily on our way, to nowhere in particular!”
I never wanted him to coach the Lakers. I was a Zen Master
devotee through and through—it was all about
the guy with the rings and the soul patch, and that absurd fascination with staring
at the floor while seated, as important basketball business transpired on
court.
The decision just didn’t make any sense in my mind, I spent
too much time recycling through an endless tape loop of “but, why?”
I probably missed too many memorable moments over the
almost-two seasons, simply because I found obstinate fault with a system that
never had a prayer when married to guys like Kobe Bryant, Dwight Howard and Pau
Gasol.
It was prideful and wrong and basically stupid of me, like parents
who turn away from a class performance because they don't approve of the silly
bumblebee costumes.
Yes, it was an abomination like no other. But how those
pom-pom antennas waved merrily through the air, as an array of giddy gunners
launched gobstoppers toward a distant honeypot.
“We’re always in a hurry, we have no time to stall!”
Mr. Toad's Wild Ride lasted 154 games, the likes of which we won’t
see again. If there’s any comparison in the annals of Laker lore, it might be
Dennis Rodman’s 23-game party rager during the 1998-99 season, in which he
averaged 2.1 points and 11.2 boards before taking an impromptu detour from the
Forum to Vegas, causing Jerry West to remove the tap from the keg.
D’Antoni wasn’t the right coach for the Lakers, at least not
for a team assembled from such disparate elements. And of course, nobody could
have won with all those injuries. Just because it’s been repeated ad nauseam, doesn’t
change that inherent truth.
He rejected the star system in an organization that
personifies it.
And the villagers with their pitchforks and fiery torches
helped hasten a foregone conclusion. Or maybe not, does it even matter?
He went out the way he came in, suddenly and amidst
contradictory reports and predictions.
And despite the dark days, D’Antoni delivered some shining moments—diagraming brilliant timeout plays, reviving the careers of young NBA
rejects and never once wavering from an extreme form of tunnel vision that
belongs to life’s true believers.
I never supported him but I find myself wishing I had paid
better attention nonetheless.
Actually, I kind of did pay attention. I think I watched all
55 losses. Sometimes, wild rides can be god-awful.
Fare thee well, Mr. D’Antoni—may the wind be always at your
back, though our roads are perpendicular!
No comments:
Post a Comment